


hold on | spiderman au

by HAILxHYDRA



Series: hold on [1]
Category: Black Widow (Movie 2020), Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Gen, Hydra (Marvel), Hydra Peter Parker
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-06
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-12 13:40:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29885400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HAILxHYDRA/pseuds/HAILxHYDRA
Summary: ❝hold on I still want you❞❝come back I still need you❞The Spider was a very mysterious figure. He only had two friends, and he usually kept to himself. All that was known was that he was taken away for hours at a time, he never trained with the others, and he was never punished.The Spider grew up, thinking that his parents abandoned him, and that Hydra was saving him by training him to be an assassin - that he was meant for all of this, that he was paying for his parents' sins. And he accepted it. He accepted that this was his life now, and there was no way to get out of the torture.He had a much more rigorous training than the other experiments. He was trained personally by the leader of Hydra, Alger Schmidt, son of Johann Schmidt. Alger was planning, as he told him several times each day, for The Spider to be the most prominent soldier in all of Hydra's history.When The Spider is given the mission to eliminate his parents, secrets are revealed, relationships are questioned, and, above all, love reigns supreme.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Peter Parker & Natasha Romanov, James "Bucky" Barnes/Natasha Romanov, Peter Parker & Natasha Romanov, Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Series: hold on [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2197320
Comments: 1
Kudos: 22





	1. Chapter 1

* * *

* * *

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_"I pull you in and feel your heartbeat"_

_"Can you hear me screaming please don't leave me"_

_"Hold on I still want you"_

_"Come back I still need you"_

_"Let me take your hand"_

_"I'll make it right"_

_"I swear to love you all my life"_

* * *

**CONFIDENTIAL FILE**

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PROJECT SPIDER

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1963-present

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PARENTAGE:

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BLACK WIDOW

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WINTER SOLDIER

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FIRST MISSION: NOT GIVEN

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NAME: THE SPIDER

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AGE: 15

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SEX: MALE

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**THIS PROJECT IS THE RESULT OF A PARTNERSHIP BETWEEN THE RED ROOM AND HYDRA**


	2. 1.1

**\--------- > part one**

**\--------- > chapter one**

**\--------- > the avengers**

**:::::::::::::::::::**

_\--- Flashback ---_

_"Push! Just push, Natalia!" the nurse shouted at Natasha as she was giving birth. Currently, Natasha was in the Red Room's med bay, giving birth to a baby that she did not want to have. When she first arrived at the Red Room, they took out everyone's ability to give birth, since many of their missions involved seducing a man, and there was no time for pregnancy. Pregnancy was a weakness. They removed everyone's ability but hers. Right after she entered the Red Room, she was deemed 'fit enough' to carry the baby that was going to go on to be the next leader of Hydra - the child of the Winter Soldier and the Black Widow; a cold, distant killing machine, a child raised from birth to kill. The baby would be the perfect soldier - the perfect icon for all of Hydra's missions._

_And so Natalia pushed. She tried with all her might to stay awake so she could see her baby, but, eventually, she passed out, but not before hearing someone, who, by the looks of it, was Alger Schmidt, the new leader of Hydra, saying, "Ahhh. Such beauty. He shall be Hydra's Spider."_

_\--- End of Flashback ---_

That was decades ago, when she and James were still part of Hydra and the Red Room, and James still had long hair (Natasha forced him to cut it to how it was before he became a super soldier). Now, they were relatively safe, and their baby was God knows where, doing God knows what. Of course they still thought of him in their every waking moment, but they didn't even know where he was or if he was even _alive_. All they could do was hope that, wherever he was, he was safe. But, as he was raised by Hydra to be its next leader, there were no guarantees he was safe and doing what a normal person should be doing.

"Natalia? Are you okay? You kinda spaced out there for a moment," James said as he grinned widely at Natasha. He looked at her with such adoration that it seemed impossible for a human to hold that much emotion.

It was early in the morning - around 7 A.M, and Natasha was sipping her coffee while James was making scrambled eggs for breakfast. It was just a normal Saturday for them - wake up, go hang out with Steve and Clint (for James and Natalia respectively), and then spend the evening checking in with the search team for their son. Obviously, the team did not know that this person was their son, and James and Natasha told them that he was one of their _acquaintances_ from their time in Hydra.

"Yeah, I'm fine," she replied, making an effort to smile at him. He saw right through her act - he always did; he knew her a bit _too_ well.

"You sure? You seem a bit down right now," he said as he softly caressed her cheek with his non-metal hand. She leaned into his touch, as it was the only thing keeping her sane these past few weeks, since they had finally figured out how to locate their child.

"Um, well, I guess I was thinking about him. It's his birthday today," she whispered softly, closing her eyes and sighing. He would be turning 15 today, if they gave him the super soldier serum. There was no need for the serum to be injected into him, as he was the son of two of the most deadly assassins in the world, but Hydra would have wanted him to be the 'best' he could be. And, if they gave him the serum, he probably already had a lot of red in his ledger.

James jerked his hand back and Natasha cringed at the loss of contact. James, realizing his mistake, put both of his hands and turned her head so she was facing him. He stared into her piercing green eyes, trying to figure out what was going on in that brain of hers. She stared right back, and it was as if she was staring right into his soul. James eventually looked away, to the tiled kitchen floor.

"Natalia, it's okay. He's okay. You have to let go. We're already doing everything we can. Now we can only sit back and wait for him to appear on our radar," he sighed as he leaned over the kitchen table, his hands still cradling her face. "Natalia-"

"He's our baby, James! How could you not worry about him?" she cried out as she stood up, slamming her hands on the kitchen table. James stood up to match her height, looking her right in her face, scanning her eyes for any information as to why the sudden outburst occurred.

When he couldn't see any answers in her eyes, he exclaimed, "I do worry about him! I _pray_ that he doesn't have to go through the same things that we did - that he still gets to keep his innocence! But he won't! And it's my fault that the poor kid was subjected to all that torture!" His voice raised to a shout but he calmed down after he got it all out.

"It doesn't seem like you care about him! You barely do anything to help find him!" Natasha raised her voice to match James's tone and let a single tear roll down her cheek.

"Natalia, I love him! I've never met him, but he's our child, so I do and will always love him _unconditionally_! We could've been a family! _I_ could've been a father! And every _single_ day, I _wish_ I could've taken him with me when I escaped! Then at least he would be safe right now!" He shouted the last sentence. But as soon as he saw the tear on Natasha's face, he calmed down enough to add on to it, "And you could've been a mother, Natalia."

"I don't think I would've been a good mother," Natasha muttered as she crossed her arms across her chest and furrowed her eyebrows, not looking James in the eye, and instead looking at the far right corner of the room. James took her in his arms and rubbed her back, burying his face in her hair.

"I think you would've been an amazing mother, Natalia," he murmured into her hair.

"What kid would want an assassin as his mother? Imagine career day! 'Oh hey guys! My mom's a professionally trained assassin who's also like a hundred years old! What does your mother do?'" she chuckled.

"We could be our own little assassin family," he laughed, pulling back and wrapping his arms around her waist.

She put her arms on his shoulders, smiled, and said, "Yeah, I guess we could."

And then she pulled him down and kissed him.


	3. 1.2

\--------->part one

\---------> chapter two

\--------->the spider

::::::::::::::

Meanwhile, at the Hydra headquarters, it was early in the morning, around 4 A.M, and it was time for everyone to start waking up.

"Hail Hydra! Breakfast is in 10 minutes! Wake up!" the warden shouted as he walked through the prison wings. Life wasn't always this good. Sometimes they had to wake up hours earlier, only getting one to two hours of sleep, and sometimes they skipped breakfast completely, moving on to training right away.

They were taught that the only way to get stronger is to train. And so their training consisted of multiple different exercises, some of them not being exercises at all, and instead being forms of torture.

No one ever thought there was another way to live. No one ever _wanted_ another way to live - they thought the outside world was even more cruel and darker than the Hydra headquarters could ever be. Everyone in The Spider's wing was either born and raised within Hydra, or they were taken at a very young age so they could not remember anything but life in Hydra.

It was a dangerous way to think. Talking about what life outside Hydra could be like was always punished with death. For everyone except The Spider.

The Spider always used to do things - break the rules, prank the commanders, bring some extra food to the younger kids; anything to cheer them up. But he never got punished, while the other experiments were tortured on a daily basis. They were envious of him, that was clear, but they were also curious.

The Spider was a very mysterious figure. He only had two friends, Scott Müller and Camila Schneider, and he usually kept to himself. All that was known was that he was taken away for hours at a time, he never trained with them, and he was never punished. Although everyone's parents were known to them and the others, no one, including himself, knew who The Spider's parents were.

When he was taken away for those hours, he was hooked up to a machine that erased most of his memories. He was tortured for hours, through electric shock and cuts and bruises all over his body. He was trained from 8 A.M. in the morning to 10 P.M. in the night.

But, worst of all, they twisted and warped what very few memories he had of his parents to make it seem like they were the villains in his story. That they subjected him to all this pain. That, since they had left him behind, they did not care about him and never wanted him. They did not include any faces or names within his memories.

So, The Spider grew up, thinking that his parents abandoned him, and that Hydra was saving him by training him to be an assassin. That he was meant for all of this, that he was _paying_ for his parents' sins. And he accepted it. He accepted that this was his life now, and there was no way to get out of the torture.

Everyday, he put on a mask, and went on with his seemingly mundane life. He had not been sent on any missions so far, but he was hopeful that, one day, he would be sent on the mission that proves his worth to all of Hydra.

Everyone kept on telling him to _rise up_. That he was going to be the successor to Johann Schmidt, the greatest leader in all of Hydra's history. They pressured him to be better. They told him that his parents were so much better, and since he hated his parents, he believed them, and tried harder everyday to impress them.

He was not strong. He was not intelligent. He was not good enough. Because how could he be good enough when there is _always_ someone better than him? Someone that could take down the opponent in 5 seconds instead of 6. There was always something to do better, and the commanders of Hydra only focused on his flaws.

_"Little Spider, do this!"_

_"Little Spider, do that!"_

He had a much more rigorous training than the other experiments. He was trained personally by the leader of Hydra, Alger Schmidt, son of Johann Schmidt, and the person who _rose up_ and took control of Hydra. Alger was planning, as he told him several times each day, for The Spider to be the most prominent soldier in all of Hydra's history.

And with all of these thoughts in his head, the little Spider went to breakfast. He was lucky that there was breakfast, since many of the older kids never got that much food, anyway. _Although,_ he thought, _Sir Schmidt would probably not allow me to not have breakfast, since he is training me to become the most prominent soldier in all of Hydra's history, and, for that, I need to look good._

There was one thing that set apart The Spider from all of the other experiments. No, it wasn't that he got special treatment or that he was mysteriously gone for most of the day, no. It was the fact that he actually _liked_ being there. He loved being part of Hydra, being trained to kill, growing up to be a professional assassin. He, unlike the others, did not need any trigger words to turn him into a killing machine. He was already bloodthirsty; he was ready to kill at all times.

Whenever The Spider was seen during the day, he was with his supposed 'mentor', Alger Schmidt. There were even theories that he was the _son_ of Alger Schmidt, and that Alger was training The Spider to take his position once he died. The latter was true, although the first part was not.

And so he sat down at his table in the cafeteria. Alone, isolated from the rest of the world, although, in this case, it was the rest of the cafeteria that rejected him and his abilities.

Today they were serving stale bread and expired butter. It was a rule, in the facility, that the good food would always go to the commanders, the warden, and all the other high-ranking officers. Then, whatever food was left after their feasts would be served to all the experiments for breakfast (if they got it), lunch, and dinner. Dinner was a rarity, as there was often not enough food left over after lunch.

Scott and Camila rushed over to his table with their trays in their hands and sat down right in front of him. He looked up at them, raising his eyebrows at the speed by which they came into the cafeteria, and the fact that they looked pretty worn out.

Scott had a tall, lanky build. He was about 6 feet tall, and was 19 years old. He had curly brown hair and a heart-shaped face. His cheeks were always pink, and he was, as one girl said, 'absolutely adorable'. Scott was The Spider's older brother. He wasn't actually his brother, but he certainly acted like it. Scott was always there to help him with bullies, train him just a bit harder, and crack jokes when the tension in the room was palpable.

Camila, on the other hand, was not _adorable_. She was, as another boy put it, 'burning hot'. She had a fair complexion with rosy cheeks, and an average height for her age - about 5'4" at 18 years old. She had chocolate brown eyes and snow white hair - the perfect combination. She had already received her first mission at the age of 17, and was like a big sister to The Spider, although sometimes she acted like his mother - taking care of him when no one else would.

But now, both of them looked tired and they were panting, as if they were just running across the facility to get to him. Scott held up a finger and began to catch his breath. Camila just smiled weakly at him and looked at Scott, her eyes holding an unsaid question.

Scott nodded at her and she said, "Look. We got intel that Alger Schmidt is planning on giving an announcement today during breakfast. I don't know what it's about exactly, but my source said that it has something to do with you. Has he said anything to you about it?"

"Actually, I don't know anything about it. Alger has been avoiding me these past few days. Do you guys have any idea about what he is going to talk about?" The Spider asked through a mouthful of stale bread and butter.

"Well, I guess we'll find out. Guess who just climbed up to the front of the cafeteria?" Scott asked sarcastically. The Spider and Camila turned their heads to face the front of the cafeteria, where, miraculously, Alger Schmidt was standing, about to clear his throat.

"Cut one head off and two more shall take its place! Hail Hydra!" Alger shouted.

"Cut one head off and two more shall take its place. Hail Hydra," the experiments replied monotonously.

"I have some very good news," he started. "The Spider has been given his first mission."

At this statement, both Scott and Camila raised their eyebrows inquisitively, asking if he knew what his mission was, but, as he didn't know, he just shrugged and continued looking at Schmidt.

"As all of you know, when one of you is ready for your first mission, it will be given to you. You are first tested on your strength, agility, intelligence, and intuitiveness, as these are all key aspects in winning a fight, and, thus, completing a mission," he finished. He paused for some time, presumably waiting for applause that never came. It wasn't a secret that almost everyone hated The Spider, but him getting his mission before them just gave them another reason to hate him.

"That is all. Thank you. You may resume your breakfast," he stated, coming up to The Spider and his friends.

"May I meet you in my office?" Schmidt asked him. He stood up and started walking behind Schmidt. He turned, now walking backwards, and mouthed the word 'later' to Scott and Camila, who understood and nodded.

When they reached his office, Schmidt opened the door for The Spider and let him come in, and immediately shut the door once he was inside. It's not as if The Spider had never been to Alger's office before, it was just that he never took the time to observe everything closely.

He looked at the picture frames on the walls. Almost all of them were of him and Alger Schmidt. He even had a photo of The Spider on his desk. It was no secret that they shared a close bond over their love of violence, but, one could say that they had grown fond of each other and had developed a father-son like relationship.

Schmidt cleared his throat and picked up the photograph of The Spider and him.

"Little Spider, I want you to know that this will be your first mission, and, even if you fail, you will always be welcome here. Do you want to know what your mission is?"

"Yes, sir," The Spider replied, getting nervous for what was going to come.

"You will go undercover into New York City as a high school student named Peter Benjamin Parker. You are the son of two deceased S.H.I.E.L.D. agents, and you are living with your aunt. I assume you know what S.H.I.E.L.D. is?"

When he nodded mutely, Schmidt continued.

"Your mission is to befriend Anthony Edward Stark - preferably become an intern or something of his, and eliminate two of his colleagues. Your targets' names are James Buchanan Barnes and Natalia Alianovna Romanova."

"If you don't mind me asking, sir, why do I have to eliminate them? Who are they anyway?" The Spider asked.

"James was originally the Winter Soldier. I presume you know who that is? He has betrayed us by joining the Avengers and fighting against Hydra. Natalia was... the Black Widow. She also betrayed us by leaving Hydra, her home, for a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent," Schmidt said.

"They were also..." Schmidt shook his head and decided against telling the kid about his true parentage.

"They were also what, sir?" The Spider pressed. Maybe he would finally get some information about his parents?

"They were also very good soldiers. It's a shame we have to kill them. You are dismissed. I know Camila and Scott wanted to tell you something," Schmidt continued as he showed him to the door. "You are leaving this night, and you will arrive in New York City tomorrow morning, if everything goes to plan."

"Thank you, Schmidt sir," he said as he walked out of the office.

"Please, Little Spider, it's just Alger," Schmidt smiled as the little teenager strolled out of the office, probably wanting to tell his friends all about his mission. _You know, sometimes, Little Spider, you remind me of myself when I was your age,_ he thought.


End file.
